The Chair Lift

Chair lifts are an important aid for many people to stay in their homes when their mobility slows them down. There are several kinds of chair lifts; from the straight up and down, to the ones that go round corners and then there's type that John has, that have a track that folds up when it is not in use because the chair lift comes down across the front door blocking the exit.


On this particular day I decided to get to John early because I had a few extra calls on my round that I had never been to before and was not sure what they would entail. John is a bit of an enigma, sometimes you go in and you are out in ten minutes and other days you can be in with him for an hour, which makes planning your day a bit tricky and was another reason for getting there early.
  As I walk in I see that John is up and about already, this is good news as it means I have not got ten minutes of coaxing him out of bed and then waiting for him find his balance before attempting to go upstairs for his wash.
'Morning John.' I enquire whilst prompting his medication. 'How are you today?'
'Not so mucking fusty' came the usual response.
'I'll just bring the chair lift down and then we can go upstairs for your wash'
'Ok Boss'
I lowered the track in front of the front door before walking upstairs to sit on the chair to bring it down. I know you can do all this from a remote downstairs but I quite enjoy the ride. At least I did until I got three feet from the end and the thing came to a dead halt with all the lights going off. After fiddling around with various switches I came to the conclusion that it was in need of professional help.
I  fetch a bowl to fill with hot water and wash John in the lounge before getting him dressed. As I was making a cup of tea to go with his breakfast I glanced at the clock 'Oh good, despite all this kerfuffle, it has still only taken half an hour.'
'Right John, I have sent a message to you daughter explaining about the chair. As I obviously can't use the front door, I will go out the back way, do you know where the key is?
'Should be in the door'
'It's not there'
'Oooh! I haven't seen it since I came out of hospital'!'
'Have you got any ideas?'
'Might be in my coat'
'Where's that'
'Ooooh I haven't seen it since I came out of hospital'
So off I go in search of the coat as the realisation that all the downstairs exits are patio doors hits me; I could be spending the morning trapped in the house waiting for a repair man. I eventually find a coat under a pile of clothes but no key!!!
'It's not there'
'Not that one the green one'
Off I go again aware that time is slipping away rapidly. I find the green coat in the bedroom, but still no key
'I tell you what, it might be in that drawer over there marked keys' says John as he picks up his breakfast bowl and slowly heads to the sink to wash up; seemingly totally oblivious to my increasing anguish
Great, I've found it, but in my haste to open the door, I pull the blind down blind on top of me.
'It does that now and again' says John
Frustration is building inside me now as I fumble, all fingers and thumbs, to put the blind back up and rush to the back gate which, you guessed it, won't open.
'The gate won't open John'
'Ah! You'll need a screw driver as I screw it shut against the post.'
'Ok, so where's your screw driver?'
'Ooooh I haven't seen that since I came out of hospital...........'


Three quarters of an hour later I made it to my next call