snippets of conversation

Discussion with one of my ladies when I was running late

'I have got to go' I apologised 'because I have got to get to my next gentleman out of bed'

'You don't have to wash him as well, do you?'

'yes'

'Even his, you know.......(hushed voice) .... willy'

(hushed voice) 'Yes'

'Yuk! The thought of it makes me feel sick. I couldn't do it! especially if a little bit of.... you know.... dribble came out'

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Another lady at meal time

'There you go M'dear, a nice ham sandwich for your supper'

'Thank you,  let me take my teeth out so I can eat it'

This turned out to be a bit more serious as her denture hurt when she ate, so I spoke to the family about a trip to the dentist

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Whilst I was showering one of my ladies and was about to clean her nether regions,  she innocently asked...... 

'Can you check to see if my pussy is OK.'
She was of course talking about her cat.
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 Quote from a lady at a care home social event
 'Why do they call them coffee mornings, when we all drink tea?'
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Random comment from a lady who feels the need to share this sort of information on a regular basis
'I finally went to the toilet today. You won't believe how messy it was' 'It was the messiest poo ever and took me ages to clean up.' etc...........
As if I would really want to know
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Whilst chatting to a lady who had recently had a fall and needed more care than normal, I suggested that I could help her in the shower
'My God No! I am not letting you anywhere near my Minnie mouse'
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A Lady looking up at some old bibles on the top shelf of her library
'Do you Know?  When I was able to get about more , I used to dust those bibles religiously every week
==========================================================================
'Do you know Harry Rednapp picks the players for all the teams'
'What every football team?'
'Oh Yes!'
'So he must know who is going to win'
'Ah! with a wink 'Now you are cottoning on.'
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talking to one of my ladies tonight who said 'I had Spicy bean burger in BHS today, My friend thought it was really spicy, I thought it was quite bland'.
I replied that's a shame, I made a sausage casserole tonight which had leeks, garlic, carrot, baked beans, turmeric and curry powder in it, you probably would have liked that instead.
'Oh no, not for me thanks, I don't like spicy food!'
'But you said the bean burger wasn't spicy enough for you'
'That's right, I think it must just be different recipes, some are and some aren't'
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Quote from my 100 year old lady today 'You know what dear, I think I am getting old.'
Second quote from her
'Do you know, I went out today and whilst sitting in the square looking at all the people, I came to the conclusion I'm wearing the wrong clothes'
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Had to smile today. My ears are blocked up with wax so I can't hear very well. So as I entered each house call I apologised for the fact that I might be a bit deaf today, and without exception they all said 'Pardon!'
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Elderly gentleman with dementia who has been going round on a loop asking and saying the same thing for about an hour, approaches another resident in our care home who has all her faculties.
'I didn't come in here to die'
'Didn't you Duck? What did you come for then?'

The daily routine

During my short time as a care worker I have discovered that routine is probably one of the most important things for my ladies and gents. They like to know who is coming and at what time, then more importantly, what we are doing in what order when we arrive. If I have a new carer going in to see one of my people I will always make a point of running through the order that I do things; Not only does this help the person we are caring for but also helps us as carers complete the call within the time allowed. People with dementia obviously need this routine more than anyone else but It was not until recently that I realised how much the things we say can also become part of that routine.






I have been looking after Brian for about six weeks now and quickly got him into a routine. As he sits on the chair of the stair lift I say (as I do with a lot of people) 'first floor ladies lingerie,' to which he will always chuckle and reminisce about the TV programme 'Are you being served'. Then when we get to the shower I  regale him with a verse of singing in the rain. which he dutifully joins in with; He has a little green pouch with his money in, so a burst of The Robin Hood theme has to be sung as I put it on the bedside cabinet for him, and so on.






The other night I went in and Brian had got very distressed about a family matter and his wife was almost at the end of her tether trying to calm him down. As with a lot of dementia patients he had become fixated on the problem and would not let it go despite several reassurances. It is in these circumstances that staying calm when all round you are not is the best policy. A change of subject was needed but I was not sure how, so I decided to just start getting him ready for bed, I coaxed Brian out of his chair and helped him as he unsteadily made his way to the chair lift. He was extremely confused and barely seemed to know what was going on.


As he sat in the chair of the stair lift I chipped in with my usual line 'First floor; Ladies lingerie'


Almost immediately, I could see the tension leaving his face as he looked up and chuckled 'Oh! It's you.' He then leant forward and gave me a hug.






It was one of those special moments that makes being a care worker worth while.




It also occurred to me, that my little one liners and songs are what identifies me to a lot of people with dementia,  His short term memory did not pick up on my face but my daily routine performance.

look on the bright side

I have the privilege of looking after a Centurion. She is a lovely lady who makes me smile with her no nonsense approach to life. We have some lovely conversations about her life as a child. One such story was how she regretted never learning to ride a bike. This was because her Father thought it inappropriate for girls to be riding bikes







Recently she has been under the weather and feeling a bit fed up with herself.
'It's terrible being old and living on your own' she said after the niceties had passed
'Yes, I can see that' I sympathised
'You don't see anyone from one day to the next, hardly anyone visits. Still what can you do? Read a newspaper; read a book, look out of the window;  I'm not one for watching television, so with these dark nights you end up going to bed at seven. It's no life you know' she continued
'I know, it must be lonely for you'
'Never mind dear' she said, bucking herself up ' It could be worse'
'How do you mean?' 
After a moments thought she smiled and said  'No bed!'

Animal Antics

Many of my ladies and gents have pets to keep them company. I have often found these four legged friends to be a useful tool when visiting someone for the first time, start talking about their beloved animals and you are the best care worker in the world.

In fact some animals rely on my calls as much as the people I am caring for, because it is also their opportunity for a toilet break and food.








I have two ladies with cats; The first lady often greets me with 'Where's my cats? I haven't seen my animals for three days. I bet that Cow next door has taken them in.' She will then lean out of the window and start shouting at the unfortunate lady to let her cats out of her house. I might add at this point that she only has one cat and the neighbour does not take it in, and this regular event takes place at about 7AM most mornings until the feline responsible for all this commotion returns,usually before I have to move on to my next call. I have to admit I am always glad if the cat has already returned before I arrive because it makes my life so much easier; if the cat is home I have a calm reasonable lady to deal with, whereas she will be very agitated and won't do anything until the little moggy has returned.
On Wednesdays  I arrive later for one reason or another and on one such occasion,  I could hear the lady shouting out of the window before I entered the house.
'I have lost my cat, someone has stolen him, I haven't seen him for three days, I bet it's her next door.'
 I spent the best part of the call calming her down by saying that he always comes home, I saw him yesterday and it's a nice day so perhaps he has decided to spend time in the sunshine. All to no avail. I have to admit to being concerned myself at this time of day and even took to shouting out of the window myself in a vain attempt to lure him home. Because the lady was so agitated and I had other calls to make, I rang the office to explain the situation before leaving some 40 minutes later. It was on the way out that I happened to glance into the bedroom and saw the cat innocently curled up on her bed oblivious to the consternation it had caused.

Another lady's cat always comes over for a stroke as I enter, but scuttles off the moment I start work because it knows that I am about to get the hoover out. It always seems to forgive me afterwards and  comes back purring as I sit down to fill in my care notes. All very nice but I wish that it did not sit on the page I am writing on.

And finally there is one lady that I visit with two beautiful collies called Ghost and Whiskey. When I arrive they go berserk which proves very difficult when trying to get in the door. Ghost, a stunning silver grey wolf like creature, immediately grabs his ball and barges Whiskey out of the way. Whiskey, the old boy of the two, then barks relentlessly in frustration, as if he wished he had thought about getting the ball first.

There is not much for me to do at this particular call apart from checking the lady is OK and has taken her meds, so I often stay for a chat a and more often than not play with the dogs especially when the conversation dries up a bit. I have even taken to training them to take turns with the ball and have to admit this is a bit of a treat for me as I used to have a dog and since she passed away, we have decided not to have another one due to health reasons.

After I had been visiting for a few months the lady concerned answered the door with a smile and said 

'I think my dogs think that you come to see them and not me.'

'Why is that?' I asked
'Well ten minutes before you arrive they have both started to sit by the front door waiting for you'

Did I make you jump?

Maud is a lovely lady who is very hard of hearing. I will often make her jump when I arrive because the TV is on full blast and she has not realised that I have arrived. I spend most of my time communicating through sign language; be it pointing at things, a thumbs up or a simple T sign for a cup of tea. When I give her food I always show her the packaging to give her a choice and will stand in front of her with the plate of food to indicate it is time to sit at the table and eat. It was on one such occasion that she seemed a bit doddery walking with her frame to the table, so as she sat down  I placed my hand on her back. As with a lot of these situations it is very tight for space, making it awkward to help without being a hindrance. She immediately jumped in the air and nearly fell over. I quickly grabbed her and was obviously concerned that I had made her jump or worse still I had hurt her in some way. 
'I am sorry are you OK? Did I tread on your toes?' I shouted
'No I am just very ticklish' she giggled


As I look back it strikes me that it could be a turning point in our relationship as carer and patient ,because it seemed to break the barrier of her hearing problem and we chuckled for some time after as she ate her dinner

the new hearing aids

Derek is one of these men who is lucky enough or unlucky enough in his opinion to reach 100 years of age. He can still walk and can read a book in a day. Of late his hearing has deteriorated and this became the regular topic of conversation. Firstly because the nurses do not do home visits to syringe any more so he had to go to the surgery to have it done. Then his hearing was not much better so he invested a lot of money in custom hearing aids. On the first day after they had arrived I found him fiddling around trying to get them in his ear.
'They will have to go back they do not fit' he remonstrated
'Shall I try?' I offered
This is not as straight forward as might seem. There is obviously a left and right hearing aid and unlike the national health ones they are not so easy to differentiate. Also, because they fit snuggly in each ear they are quite tricky to fit. I eventually worked out there is blue and red writing to indicate left and right and life was ok.

Two days later.
'These hearing aids aren't working again'
'Have the batteries run out'
'What in two days, I can't afford to change them that often'
It was the batteries but you are supposed to slightly remove them at night to save the charge. Another problem solved, and everything seemed alright apart from the fact that he would regularly take them out during the day and then complain they were not working when he had not quite put them back in properly' Almost every time I went in I was greeted with
'These hearing aids don't work they will have to go back.'
Two weeks go by and the hearing aid saga is beginning to settle down until, I walk and find him really despondent.
'What's the problem?'
'These hearing aids, I have spent a lot of money on them and now I think they are too loud, I think I will have to go back and get them reset'
'Am I too loud?'
'No you are alright but it's when I watch television'
'Shall we try them out now'
'OK but it's no good'

I turned the TV on and the volume was through the roof; it was so loud I could not get to the remote control quick enough to turn it down from 35 to 10 on the volume control. He had obviously had it that loud before the hearing aids arrived and not adjusted it back.
When I turned it down he said

 'Oh I didn't know you could adjust them from there.'

The Bed Linen

A few of my calls as a care worker involve housework visits which involve anything from shopping to general housework duties. One chap I visit called Jack who is quite a petite gentle man, who I will usually find sitting quietly in his armchair staring at the walls. He has dementia but is generally ok providing his routine isn't disrupted; then you will see him pacing back and forth worrying over the smallest of things. One particular thing that sets him off and gets him very agitated is when I change his bed linen.
'Leave it 'til next week' he will say, 'I  don't want my daughter to be washing every week'
So as a compromise I started doing it every other week, even though this was still too often in his opinion.







After a month or so I got call from the office saying that his daughter had phoned to complain that I was not doing the sheets every week. I see this lady quite often and get on quite well with her, so next time we met I apologised and explained the reason why.

'I see what you are saying' she said 'but I still would like it done every week if possible.'
Then a thought struck me, 'How about if you buy two identical duvet sets and while he is in the shower I will quickly change them and put them in the laundry basket. As you do the washing anyway you can pick it up on the way out and he need never know'
'That is brilliant' she said 'I'll get some today'

So our plan was put into action with two new two tone blue duvet sets; all was going well until after a couple of months I walked in to find Jack pacing up and down.
'Are you ok Jack?'
'No! I am a bit annoyed with you!'
'Oh why is that?' I asked
'Well I have been thinking and I know I told you not to do the bed sheets every week, but I reckon you haven't done them for about 8 weeks. I have looked in the record of care book and you have been writing down that you do them every week!!!!!'

The waiting game

If you ever visit anyone in a care home the entry system involves punching in the number of the  person you are visiting and waiting while it rings for about 2 minutes before cancelling.







Whilst outside one of the care homes on a cold December morning waiting for a lady to answer the door, a gentleman walks up behind me.

'Hello' I said, 'If you like I can cancel ringing my people take an age to answer.'
'It's alright' he replied Mine does too, she's as deaf as a post'
So we stand there and eventually the ringing stops.
'How about if we take it in turns,' I suggest 'If you ring your person now and which ever one answers first means at least we can both get in the main door at the same time.'
So he punches in his number and we wait.

'It really is a nightmare getting them to the door' he says. ' they are usually asleep'
'I know the feeling, I have stood here for about ten minutes trying to get in before now'  I answered, conscious that this was turning into a competition as to who had the worst time trying to get in.
His number stopped ringing, so I punched in my number again.
'It's really quite frustrating as I am a care worker and have other calls to make'
'Yes, I have come by bus and want to get back by lunch time'

Again the ringing stops and my brother in arms takes his turn at trying to get in.
'Hello' comes a familiar voice through the speaker system
'Hello It's John' says the man.
Oh! come in John' and the door eventually opens
'Who are you visiting?' I ask.
'The Buntings'
'So am I.'

Point proven

Norman is a quiet little man who does not have much to say; I have often thought that this is because despite wearing aids, his hearing is quite bad. When I entered the house for the first time the house I could hear the television blasting out at full volume, so suggested putting subtitles on for him; I am not sure it really helped as it was still as loud the next day which makes it even harder to communicate with him because you are always competing with the telly. I spend most of my time shouting my self hoarse or writing notes. Despite all this he seems to understand what is going on around him and seems quite capable.

Just recently his daughter paid a visit and was concerned that he was becoming less able to look after himself. Despite her best efforts Norman flatly refused to consider going into a Care home. The daughter even visited our office to try and get him certified as incapable and my opinion was asked for. I expressed my feeling that there was nothing wrong with him, apart from the hearing issue which was isolating him from the world.

'But what about the fact he does not wear his care line pendant alarm!' She remonstrated
'They all do that now and again, it does not mean that they are losing their marbles' I replied
'He never seems to understand what has been said'
'As I have said, I think that a lot of the problem is hearing related'

No more was said, but the daughter still concerned about the pendant alarm, printed off a note saying  'Have you got your care line on!' and put it on his lounge door so that he could see it as he came out of his bedroom

The next day underneath the note written in a slightly shaky hand were the words 'OF COURSE'

point made I think

the simple things

Whilst preparing breakfast for one of my elderly ladies she commented
 'I don't know why my daughter always leaves porridge out, I don't even like the stuff; What's wrong with a simple boiled egg for goodness sake?'





As I was visiting her the following day, I made a point of taking a couple of eggs with me. Having got her dressed and without saying a word I took her into the lounge where her breakfast was waiting. I had made a point on presentation, cutting up the bead into soldiers and laying them into a neat circle around the eggs.

'Oh that's lovely my dear' What a lovely surprise, do you know my dear husband used to always serve eggs just like that on Sundays. You have made my day and brought back many happy memories'

It's nice to be back

I recently had a weeks holiday; there is nothing like a break to refresh your energy. However, in my job the return to work can be equally refreshing and if honest can massage my ego quite a bit. Everywhere I go, I am continually welcomed with comments like It's good to have you back' and 'We have missed your smiling face'. One lady even cancelled the calls whilst I was away because her special needs son wouldn't have anyone else but me.
Although all the remarks are lovely there was one reaction I was not expecting.
I visit a few ladies in residential homes and consequently speak to other people in passing. Pauline always has visitors from elsewhere in the home so I invariable end up making cups of tea for them as well as for Pauline.  One of these visitors is a 'special needs' lady called Andrea,  Despite seeing her on and off for the past year, she is always a bit stand offish and seems to flinch with any physical contact; even something as innocent as a touch of the hand. I always make a point of including her in conversation and often make her laugh with my child like humour.

Shortly after my holiday I was sitting with Pauline and about to leave when 
Andrea happened to walk in.

'Hello Ian you're back from holiday then' she said with a beaming smile
'Yes, Andrea how are you?' I asked
'I am fine thank you. I have missed you'

Then the unexpected happened, she came running over and gave me a hug and a kiss!

This simple act had a tear welling in my eye as I left the room

A spade is a spade

As a carer I have noticed that the elderly almost go back to childhood see blog http://thelightersideofcarework.blogspot.co.uk/2013/06/be-careful-what-you-wish-for.html

A recent addition to this blog is that they say things as they are, much like a young child would.

For example, I have recently had a very nice man shadowing me called John.  He had finished his induction course and was following me round as the final part of his training. Like me, it is a complete career change for him and he was understandably a bit apprehensive about how he would get on. He was doing really well especially when he got to one call and he asked the lady if she would like a cup of tea.
'Oh Yes please' came the immediate reply
''You never have a cup of tea when I offer' I jested with her
'Well I never fancy one normally'
And out of the corner of my eye I caught her mouthing to John 'I don't like his tea'

So now the new carer is feeling good about himself, I made a point of saying 'Well at least she'll have a drink when you arrive'. whilst making a mental note of how he made her tea should I get a chance to make her one again.  John seemed ideally suited to the job if a little timid, so I made a lot of effort to encourage and alleviate some of his apprehensions.
By the end of the evening round I could see he was starting to relax and settle into the role, all my ladies and gents seemed to take to him and I was pleased that there may be another male carer joining our team who had similar views to me about  Care work.

The last call of the evening was to an elderly lady called Miriam who has her ups and downs with her moods. I did warn John beforehand, but was relieved to find Miriam in good spirits as we entered.

'Hello Miriam' I said as we walked in 'You have another man to look after you tonight'
'Oh lovely' she replied
'Would you like a cup of tea' said John, warming to his task
'Yes please'
So off he went into the kitchen which is within earshot of the lounge where  Miriam and I were sitting.
'Do you have milk and sugar?'  he calls through
'Milk. no sugar please'
Then Miriam turns to me
'Is he new then?'
'Yes, he's shadowing me tonight and will be out working on his own next week'
'How's he getting on?'
'Really well, I think he will make a good carer' I replied, aware that John was probably listening in from the kitchen
'He's not as good as you!!' came the blunt reply

Thanks Miriam that was all my ego boosting throughout the evening wiped  out in six words

The dilemma

James suffers from dementia; he is a busy little man who is always on the go, in fact he never sits down.
Just recently he had a fall and I called an ambulance to have him checked out. Having come back from hospital I was surprised to find that he had no medication, and when I asked he told me they had not given him any. He was obviously had a lot of pain in his back and could not even get out of the chair.
As the week passed by he was getting worse, so the son started giving him Paracetamol to ease the pain and after a week we called the doctor out again, asking why he had not been prescribed any drugs. It turned out that James had torn up the prescription because he wasn't going to poison his body.
So now we have some stronger pain killers and he is on the mend.


Or is he?

 Whilst he was not on medication he stayed put in his chair, resting; but now he is on medication he feels better and is on the move again. Because of his dementia he does not understand that the medication is improving his injury, and he still needs to rest. The pain goes away and he forgets he has any injury all together.

So I go round one day and find him vacuuming the floor and enter the next day to find him lying on the settee in agony

Part of me thinks
he may have got better quicker without the tablets

fifteen minutes of care

There is a lot of talk in the news today about fifteen minute care



As a care worker I do not see anything wrong with 15 minute calls; occasionally that is all that is required. I have one woman who often tells me to 'Sod off' once I have made a cup of tea and a sandwich. Other times I only pop in to check they are ok and have taken tablets; Yes I stay for a chat but sometimes they do not want to talk; any longer is an intrusion.

The problem arises when, through a profit driven industry, 6 minutes constitutes a 15 minute call. I'll leave you to work out the rest.

I have to say that I always try to give what is required regardless of time and my company has never pulled me up for spending too much time at a call. So if a lady tells me to 'Sod off after 6 minutes I will. If someone else needs a bit more attention one day through illness or loneliness, I stay longer than my fifteen minutes of allotted time.

Just for the record they are not all fifteen minute call, I spend an hour and half with one lady every day

Sometimes common sense has to prevail

When Carers can be a hindrance

Dennis is a quiet, almost reclusive chap who lives on his own and suffers with dementia. Of late he has gotten worse due to circumstances that have upset his daily routine. Invariably I walk in to find him just sitting there staring at the walls in silence, waiting for the warden or me to make our daily calls. Conversation can be quite hard, he often gives one word answers, not because he is being rude but because he can't think of any way to elaborate. As a consequence, I know that a lot of carers go in, do their tasks and leave.





Just recently I asked him why he does not go out more, and was surprised to hear that he was in fact sitting in waiting for the warden and me to arrive.

'It's rude to go out when you know someone is coming to visit'

So in fact along with his meals on wheels, our visits had become his life. He was even sitting in waiting for the 'check' call over the tannoy system

This was obviously unacceptable, so I suggested to Dennis that he at least go to  'The Coffee Morning'* on Wednesdays and I will make my visit later on that day.

The following Wednesday I arrived just after he had got home and the difference in him was remarkable; He was smiling, talkative and more alive than I have ever known since visiting him.

It's an interesting thought that Carers are supposed to improve quality of life, but in this case we had become a hindrance.

Since that day I have spoken to the family and suggested  '**Singing for the brain', which he now attends on Thursdays.


* Quote from a lady 'why do they call them coffee mornings, when we all drink tea?'
** http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=760

when size does matter.

Maud is a lovely lady who always makes me smile. She is very particular, as she puts it, whereas all the carers would say she suffers from OCD.  Today I was asked to go in to do her housework and get some shopping. We started with the bed.

'Can you pull the pillows  away so that they don't touch my headboard. If you line them up with the edge of the cupboard that will be perfect. Oh Dear you have put the sheet the wrong way round. Pull the sheet a bit further up, No not quite that far!

As I know her quite well now, I will point out at this point that we do seem to be back to where we started, to which she will giggle and then proceed with the next instruction

'Can you do hospital corners? came the final remark

'No! I am afraid not Maud, You'll have to show me how' I replied

'Well tuck the back in first and pull the corner away.'

'Ok'

'Now fold it across'

'OK'

'No! Not that way'

'Ok how about this way'

'No'

'I am sorry Maud there are only two ways I can go'

'Oh yeah!' she giggles again 'Oh well that'll have to do'

I explain all this so that you get a picture of what I am dealing with, but honestly she is quite likable and I really enjoy her company, especially as she laughs at all my jokes.

So onto the shopping; She hands me a list with everything neatly written out. Brand name,  size of container with an alternative if required.
To make sure there is no confusion we go through the list  and half way down the she comes to Vanish stain remover.

'Now you know what I mean Dear, the one that is a powder to go in the washing machine.

'Oh yes I know the one'

'I would like the smallest one they do but I am not quite sure on the actual size'

'OK'

I have given you £16, it should be enough'

Off I go to Tesco's and everything is going well, I have a few issues with some things but I am quite confident that it will be fine. Then I walk down the washing aisle to find the Vanish, and as I go to pick it up I notice that the smallest one, 750g is £6.90 but the 1kg is only £5.01.
Well obviously I picked up the cheaper one, whilst smiling to myself that she had not given me £16 by accident and she will be pleasantly surprised when I give her an extra £2 back

'Hello Maud I'm back'

'Did you get everything?'

'Yes and I saved you some money!'

'Oh good, how was that?'

I explained about the price difference.

'Oh Dear' came the reply with a look of concern on her face.

'Why?What's the problem?'

Maud leant forward and opened the cupboard door under the sink. There were all her cleaning bottles neatly lined up in height order with each one carefully turned so you could read the label; and right at the end was a gap.

'Well the reason I wanted the small one, is because it fits exactly into this spot under the cupboard.

PS. Since this blog was posted originally I have learned how to do hospital corners

good hygiene

George is an elderly man who although he can walk it can sometimes prove to be a bit of an effort.

I walked in to find him sitting at the dining table eating his lunch and as I went to give him his tablets, I noticed he had sterile gloves on his  hands






'Why are you wearing those gloves?' I enquired

'Well nobody gave me any gloves when I had my catheter fitted, so I bought my own for when I empty the urine from the bag down the toilet.'

I cringed slightly as I asked why he was eating his lunch with them on?'

'Well I forgot to put them on before I emptied my catheter bag and when I sat down to eat I realised I had not washed my hands afterwards; As the gloves were on the table, I put them on on to save me having to get up again.'

Of course silly me. Quite logical really

golf highlights

Whilst discussing the football on the telly with one of my ladies today, we moved on to sport in general.  I mentioned that the British Open golf was starting this week and that I had recorded the Scottish Open Golf highlights to watch tonight.



'Oh I think watched that last night,' she said 'Was that the one which Michelson won?'

'I don't know I haven't watched it yet'

'Oops sorry,' she said with a smile ' Still it was very exciting, it went to a play off '


That was my evening's entertainment scuppered then

the love triangle

There maybe romance blossoming at one of the care homes. The trouble is that we have a love triangle developing......

Or maybe not......

Pat was sitting in the garden talking to me, when a lady who I had never met before came over and whispered to Pat that she should keep her hands off of her Jack.
Now Jack is a quiet, amiable, unassuming sort of chap, who you will often find in the communal garden chatting to Pat . There is nothing in it, they just enjoy each other's company; Nothing more, nothing less.


So back to the story;

'Keep your hands off of my Jack, I was here first' admonishes the mystery lady.
What! says Pat. 'I don't want him. What do I want with a man in my life at my age? Nothing but trouble I've had enough of that malarkey. You can bloody well have him!

Good for her you might say, but did she really have to say all that when Jack was standing sheepishly next to her.

hot legs

Before I begin this blog I must point out that I do not consider myself to be a sex symbol of any sort.

As the long awaited Summer has finally arrived, I have been wearing tailored shorts to do my rounds. Whilst talking to other carers, I have discovered that my legs are quite the topic of conversation amongst my ladies; Almost every carer I have spoken to knows that I am wearing shorts. Some ladies have even shouted out to me whilst another carer is ringing me from their home.

'Is Ian coming this afternoon? I hope he's still wearing his shorts.' etc.

I have taken all this in good spirit, and take the view that if it brightens up their day it must be
a good thing.

Today I was walking along a corridor in a residential home and happened to pass three elderly ladies standing outside one of the apartments. I was just about to turn and walk up the stairs when I heard one of the ladies say 'Cor! he's got nice legs!' 
I instinctively looked back and saw three pairs of eyes staring at me. Not one to miss an opportunity I made a flamboyant little quick step on the spot, before smiling at them and disappearing up the stairs
I could still hear them cackling when I got to the top.
I think it made my day as much as it did theirs

 I was in  the same care home again four days later and the same three ladies were in the corridor again.
'Can I squeeze past ladies'
'Ooo! Here he is girls, that man showing off his legs again'. came the cheeky comment. 'you can squeeze past us any time you like luv. (raucous laughter) When are you coming back down?
'I'm sorry to disappoint ladies, but I am going to be at least fifteen minutes'
'That's alright me dear, we can wait!

and they did!