My favourite shower days again

The latest antics with my special needs man. If you remember for some reason he always wears a shower hat before getting in the shower, despite the fact that I am going to wash his hair. As I have said I always put it on before and sing 'Where did you get that hat?'
Well his mother has bought one for me. It is white with black spots and has a bow at the back. I look a bit like Cruella Deville dutifully wearing it and causing great joviality in the shower. Now the song is 'Where did we get those hats'
New songs have been added like 'feeling Hot Hot hot' except I say it's 'not too Hot Hot Hot' when I start to wash his hair. As it goes on I sing the 'feel it in the morning, feel it in the evening' with him coming in with the Hot Hot Hots. Recently I added 'Feel it on your fingers' and 'feel it on your crown jewels' which had him in stitches.




Today, after I finished the call and had my little chat with his mum over a cup coffee,  I bade farewell and made way to the car. Just as was about to get in the car the lady who cleans was pulling up.


'Morning Tania' I shout out.
Morning Ian, you might want to take that hat off before you go any further, I don't think we are expecting any rain.'

lost keys

One of my regular chores in life as a care worker and at home is looking for keys. I am useless at finding my own ones let alone all my ladies and gents. I have a few dementia people who can be quite imaginative with their secret stashes. under mattresses; in the fridge; in the bread bin etc.

One of my recent challenges was with Sheila who suffers from a really short span of attention.  It was the day of a neighbour's funeral and for her it was an occasion that dominated her mind. It was a change from the norm and in a strange way was something to look forward to; a chance to get away from her four walls and get out. I arrived at 0845 to find her already dressed  in her outfit, front door wide open with her pacing up and down looking out for her lift. As the funeral was not for another two hours I coaxed her back inside to take her medication and check she had eaten.
Just as I was about to leave she announced that her keys were missing and went into panic mode. Whilst  trying to calm her down we started the search in all the usual places; in her pockets; under her pillows; down the side of the settee. All to no avail. She went to see if her neighbour had a key, but still no luck as she had gone out. I was just about to give up after ten minutes when I found them in the soap dish of the shower cubicle.  Now running late and aware that I should already be at the next call I put her keys in her bag and placed it on the table suggesting that she calm down.
As I bade my farewell and crossed the road to my car I heard a door slam behind me and there was sheila coming down the path. My heart sank.
'Have you got your keys Sheila?'
The look on her face gave me the answer
I climbed over the fence to get round to back of the house to find that door also locked. The only entrance was a small kitchen window, so with the aid of a large plant pot I climbed up to open it fully, thus allowing me to reach in to open a larger window which was just big enough for me to squeeze through, clamber over the sink before eventually letting Sheila back in. I sat her down, put the television on and suggested she watched it until someone knocked on the door.
I got to my next call 30 minutes late

unexpected smile

On my way into Jean's I passed a Relative on the way out. Jean does not have many visitors so it was nice to see a smiling face as a entered the house. She can normally be quite agitated spending her  time alone, clock watching and waiting for the Carers to arrive, but with the unexpected distraction she was full of the joys of spring.


We started our routine of getting her ready for bed and as I was about to administer the medication I looked over at her bedside table and noticed that her friend had kindly made some blackcurrant juice, As I picked up the glass I could even hear some ice chinking in the bottom; a nice touch, I thought, on this hot day. It is sometimes difficult to get Jean to take medication with plain water so I offered her the glass. She dutifully took all three tablets with a large gulp of juice, before handing it back half full as she didn't want the rest. I tucked her up in bed and picked up the glass to wash up on my departure; as I tipped the liquid away I realised with horror that it was not ice chinking around in the bottom of the glass.....
                                          ....... but there in the bottom of the sink were her dentures smiling up at me.

The daily routine

During my short time as a care worker I have discovered that routine is probably one of the most important things for my ladies and gents. They like to know who is coming and at what time, then more importantly, what we are doing in what order when we arrive. If I have a new carer going in to see one of my people I will always make a point of running through the order that I do things; Not only does this help the person we are caring for but also helps us as carers complete the call within the time allowed. People with dementia obviously need this routine more than anyone else but It was not until recently that I realised how much the things we say can also become part of that routine.






I have been looking after Brian for about six weeks now and quickly got him into a routine. As he sits on the chair of the stair lift I say (as I do with a lot of people) 'first floor ladies lingerie,' to which he will always chuckle and reminisce about the TV programme 'Are you being served'. Then when we get to the shower I  regale him with a verse of singing in the rain. which he dutifully joins in with; He has a little green pouch with his money in, so a burst of The Robin Hood theme has to be sung as I put it on the bedside cabinet for him, and so on.






The other night I went in and Brian had got very distressed about a family matter and his wife was almost at the end of her tether trying to calm him down. As with a lot of dementia patients he had become fixated on the problem and would not let it go despite several reassurances. It is in these circumstances that staying calm when all round you are not is the best policy. A change of subject was needed but I was not sure how, so I decided to just start getting him ready for bed, I coaxed Brian out of his chair and helped him as he unsteadily made his way to the chair lift. He was extremely confused and barely seemed to know what was going on.


As he sat in the chair of the stair lift I chipped in with my usual line 'First floor; Ladies lingerie'


Almost immediately, I could see the tension leaving his face as he looked up and chuckled 'Oh! It's you.' He then leant forward and gave me a hug.






It was one of those special moments that makes being a care worker worth while.




It also occurred to me, that my little one liners and songs are what identifies me to a lot of people with dementia,  His short term memory did not pick up on my face but my daily routine performance.

double vision

Whilst visiting Louisa the other day she handed me a letter and asked if I could read it to her.


'It's about my eyes' she said. 'I am having my an operation on them, so hopefully I will be able to read it myself soon.'


I opened the envelope and started to read the information out loud. It was standard stuff about what to do on the day of the operation; Time and date; What to bring; where to park;  post op treatment etc.
I had read two pages and just turned over the third page to read when I stopped in my tracks.


'Have you had any trouble with double vision Louisa? I enquired
'No?'
'Are you sure?'
'Yes I'm having a cataract removed in my left eye'
'And that hasn't caused any double vision?'
'No. Why?
'Well they've sent you two identical letters in the same envelope.'

hallucinations

I was visiting Jean, my lonely lady who lives alone in a remote village. If you remember she is the one who always looks for any excuse to keep you longer than necessary and spends her day watching the clock for when the next carer arrives. In recent months I have been doing her late call and have spent a bit of time each evening talking about her past. She has some lovely stories about her escapades during the war.




Tonight I noticed a piece of cotton wool taped to her arm and asked what it was
'I have had a blood test because the doctor thought I had a urine infection but wants to check out some other avenues' she replied candidly
'So it's not a urine infection then' I enquired.
'No, bloody doctors blame everything on urine infections' she retorted
'Well it can be quite nasty,'I explained 'I've had lots of ladies and gents who have had them and they can cause hallucinations.'
'What do you mean?'
'Well, most of them believe they can see people in the corners of the room and they start talking to them'
'I talk to my departed husband every morning; I tell him he has to go before you lot arrive'
'That's different, lots of people do that. In these cases they hear them talking and even hold conversations. They really believe the person is in the room.'
'Oh really! Just from something as simple as a urine infection?'
'Yes!'
'Incredible! she chuckled 'How do I go about getting one of these urine infections? I could do with some company'

Not every one is the same

It struck me today how much I have to change my behaviour according to the different situations and people I am visiting. You can't teach this skill as it is something you either do naturally or have to learn as you gain experience.

One of my ladies for example, loves to listen to me singing when I do my chores (must be tone deaf) but occasionally when she has had a bad night she wants silence. I have learnt over time to assess her mood before I make too much noise.There are some ladies and Gents who like a laugh and joke and others who just want you to go in, do your job and disappear; Some want to know all the gossip and others barely say a word; Some of my ladies like a cuddle when they are feeling a bit low; Nearly all appreciate a kiss on the forehead to say goodnight, whereas there are a few who definitely 'DON'T!'

Subject matter has to be considered too, I avoid politics and religion at all costs. You have to tune into people's sense of humour as well, I remember one occasion when I got it totally wrong;  I am always looking for little bits of humour or news to share as I do my visits, so when I saw a clip on 'You Tube' with two men doing a clever routine in the nude with a small towel to cover their decency, I thought I had found  a little gem. I went from call to call demonstrating the scene using tea towels, keeping my clothes on of course. Everyone found it hilarious, especially as I was deliberately being rubbish at it and kept dropping the towel on the floor.

'I think you had better keep you clothes on for now Dear!'
'Perhaps a bit more practise is in order'
'I don't think it's ready for the stage yet Luv'

 As I left each house I could hear chuckles and guffaws echoing in my ears and I was feeling pleased with my day's work. Apart from one gentleman who stopped me in mid flow and told me that it was ridiculously crude and not funny at all. What's more he barely spoke to me properly for two days despite my apologies. I stick to talking about  the routes I take on my bike rides now.

On the other side of the coin there is Sandra, a lady brought up in the East End of London who loves a bit of smutty humour. I clearly have to be careful what I say as I have a professional image to uphold but the other day she was looking at her bird feeders and I told her a story about the ones in my garden.....

I had bought some suet balls and a feeder for the feeding station and watched with anticipation for any sign of activity. After about two weeks I had given up hope and mentioned this to my wife, who said we have to be patient as the birds need to get used to them being there. The knowledgeable remark of an avid 'Springwatch' viewer
Another week went by and whilst at work I received a text from my wife which read like this: -
'Great tits on your fat balls' to which I replied  'Yes darling, but are there any birds on our feeders yet?'

 When I hit the punch line Sandra laughed like a drain for about five minutes.

Gallows humour

Edith is an independent lady who refuses to acknowledge the fact that she is getting on a bit. She is over 90 but still likes to get out and about despite her family telling her to take it easy and let them drive her about.

Yesterday as I entered her apartment found her sitting in her armchair with a huge black eye. 

'Goodness Edith, what have you done to yourself'

'I fell over outside Tesco' she replied casually.
'Tesco?' I said with a certain amount of shock. 'But that's on the other side of town!

'I know, I fell off of the bus' 

'What were you doing going to Tesco's when there is a shop round the corner?'

'Well my kettle broke, so I was taking it back'

'You should have waited until your daughter could take you'

'I know, I was a bit silly really; ended up at A&E for three hours and I have bruised all my ribs too'

'Yes it was more than a bit silly and I bet you didn't have your walking stick with you either'

'Nope and you know what was even sillier' she smirked 'it wasn't until later on that I realized that I had bought the kettle from Sainsbury's'

the water jug

Meals on wheels is a life line for a large number of elderly people. They provide a hot meal every day served on a plate from a friendly smiling face. The food is wholesome and provides a balanced diet for many who can't be bothered to cook and start to neglect their health. Like care workers, they are also another contact with the outside world for what would otherwise be a lonely existence. They also provide an information service to the elderly with various leaflets about health issues and awareness of cold calling fraudsters.





Earlier this year they gave all their customers a fleece blanket along with some instant hot drinks to help keep warm through the winter months.  I had to smile as I entered  each house and saw the now familiar black and white fleece folded on the side or laying on a lap.

'I see you have had a present from Meals on wheels' I would say to them
'Oh yes, isn't it lovely' and 'What a great idea' and 'It's keeping me nice and warm' came the regular replies.

No doubt pleased with the popularity of this gesture Meals on wheels tried again this week, giving a free water jug along with a letter explaining the importance of keeping hydrated. As a carer I thought this was a great idea as I calculated that 90 percent of my ladies and gents have had a urine infection at some time since I started and one gentleman has died.

Needless to say, I used the jug as a talking point, but unfortunately I was not greeted with the same positive responses as the blanket.

'Bloody thing taking up space'
'I can't drink all that in a day'
'I have spent all my life drinking tea, why should I start changing now?'
''I suppose it's some busy body up at the council trying to tell us what we should and shouldn't do again'
'You can tell those do gooders to stick their jug where the sun don't shine'

Coming from ladies and gentleman as old as a hundred who am I to argue; I obviously tried, but in most cases my protestations fell on deaf ears

I was beginning to get a bit wary about commenting on these unwanted gifts and receiving barrages of abuse;
There was one lady, however, that I was convinced would be pleased about her new jug. Despite having a lot of money, she would always make do with a coke bottle as her water receptacle, with myself and another carer always on the look out for a new one as a replacement when the old one got stale and began to smell.
'Why do I need to waste money on a proper jug when an old coke bottle will do' she would say
So as I entered her house I was pleased to see the new jug sitting on the side but dismayed to see it empty. Perhaps it had only just arrived I thought, so unperturbed and convinced she would be pleased with her new acquisition, I enquired if she liked it.

'Bloody thing, what a waste of time!' she replied
I was quite taken back by this retort and immediately started on my healthy living response.....
'But you need to drink plenty of water to stop urine infections'
'I know that!' she said
'And you of all people should know that'
'I know!'
'You had urine infection only last month'
'I know!
'And you could do with a new jug as those old coke bottles are unhygenic'
'I know!'
'So why are you not using it'
'Bloody thing leaks, it has a pin hole in the bottom, I fell asleep and woke up with water everywhere'

Mistaken Identity

Phylis lives all by herself rattling round in a huge house in the middle of nowhere. Because she has dementia, she gets very confused about what time of day it is and what we are coming in to do. I know that she particularly looks forward to my visits so I always try to stay patient with her as she repeats herself relentlessly throughout the call.  It's quite sad that all she really looks forward to in life is our four visits a day. As I leave she always wants to know how long she has to wait for the next carer to call and who it might be?

I had not seen her for about a week and was asked to go out to her at the last minute today because someone phoned in sick. As I enter the I hear her call from her sitting room.






'Hello, Who is it?
'It's Only Ian, Phylis'
'Oh Hello Ian. What have you come to do?'
'Well shall we go to the bathroom and get you washed, dressed and changed into some clean clothes'
'I hope you are a bit more 'with it' than last night'
'What do you mean?'
'Well you didn't seem to know what you were doing last night'
'I wasn't here Phylis'
'Yes you were, it took four attempts to get my pad on and you didn't even remember where the key was to lock up!'
'Definitely not me, I wasn't even working'
'I am sure he said his name was Ian'

'Then the penny dropped that we have another new carer called Ian working for us'

'Oh you mean Big Ian' I explained
'Why do you call him Big Ian?' she asked
'Because he is six foot five and I am five foot four'
'Oh that explains it, he does look like you though!

An hour later I happened to be speaking to BIG Ian to clarify a few things about some calls he was making that evening. I asked him how he got on with Phylis and he started laughing, it turned out that he had tried to put a new pad on with out taking the old one off and got in a right old pickle. I told him not to worry I have done similar things myself because you lose track with her continual bombardment of questions. He finished the story off by proudly repeating her passing words

'Thank you Ian you always make me laugh and I will always think of you as my friend'

I didn't have the heart to tell him that she thought she was talking to me.

Did I make you jump?

Maud is a lovely lady who is very hard of hearing. I will often make her jump when I arrive because the TV is on full blast and she has not realised that I have arrived. I spend most of my time communicating through sign language; be it pointing at things, a thumbs up or a simple T sign for a cup of tea. When I give her food I always show her the packaging to give her a choice and will stand in front of her with the plate of food to indicate it is time to sit at the table and eat. It was on one such occasion that she seemed a bit doddery walking with her frame to the table, so as she sat down  I placed my hand on her back. As with a lot of these situations it is very tight for space, making it awkward to help without being a hindrance. She immediately jumped in the air and nearly fell over. I quickly grabbed her and was obviously concerned that I had made her jump or worse still I had hurt her in some way. 
'I am sorry are you OK? Did I tread on your toes?' I shouted
'No I am just very ticklish' she giggled


As I look back it strikes me that it could be a turning point in our relationship as carer and patient ,because it seemed to break the barrier of her hearing problem and we chuckled for some time after as she ate her dinner

fifteen minutes of care

There is a lot of talk in the news today about fifteen minute care



As a care worker I do not see anything wrong with 15 minute calls; occasionally that is all that is required. I have one woman who often tells me to 'Sod off' once I have made a cup of tea and a sandwich. Other times I only pop in to check they are ok and have taken tablets; Yes I stay for a chat but sometimes they do not want to talk; any longer is an intrusion.

The problem arises when, through a profit driven industry, 6 minutes constitutes a 15 minute call. I'll leave you to work out the rest.

I have to say that I always try to give what is required regardless of time and my company has never pulled me up for spending too much time at a call. So if a lady tells me to 'Sod off after 6 minutes I will. If someone else needs a bit more attention one day through illness or loneliness, I stay longer than my fifteen minutes of allotted time.

Just for the record they are not all fifteen minute call, I spend an hour and half with one lady every day

Sometimes common sense has to prevail

patience is a virtue

Weekends can be the most demanding and stressful time for carers; As we all have every other weekend off,  those of us  that are working are trying to fit in two rounds as best we can. So let me set the scene, I got up at 5.30 am to make my first call at 6am; I then work until 1.30pm and have an hour and a half break before starting again at 3pm. As the evening goes on I am gradually running behind for various reasons and I finally get to Lorna at 7pm knowing I still have another four calls to make before I can finally put my feet up.



Now Lorna is a fastidious lady who will always take the full amount of time allocated, even when she says she will hurry the minutes seem to disappear, but Heigh ho! that is just one of those things.
As I enter I make a point of saying I am sorry for being late and that I am in a bit of a hurry because I still have lots of people to see.
'Okay' she says 'let's make it quick'
Everything is going well until I start to help her undress. As she takes off her top I start to fold it up.
'Not like that' she says 'Let me do it'
Now I know I am in trouble,  this simple task will take forever as she meticulously folds the top like a complicated piece of origami; So I go to find something to fill the time; Scurrying off to the kitchen I make a sandwich for her supper and come back just as she is finishing.
On to her thermal vest, which she also insists on folding, so off  I go again, this time I prepare her bed, puffing up the pillows & duvet and pulling back the sheets.
'How are we doing?' I enquire through gritted teeth from the bedroom.
'Nearly done' came the reply. So in my ever increasing frustration to get finished, I quickly fill in my record of care notes before returning to her side,  She looks up, smiles and hands me the neatly folded items of clothing from her lap.

'Actually you might as well put them in the laundry basket, they'll need washing!'

I finally got home at 9.30pm

When Carers can be a hindrance

Dennis is a quiet, almost reclusive chap who lives on his own and suffers with dementia. Of late he has gotten worse due to circumstances that have upset his daily routine. Invariably I walk in to find him just sitting there staring at the walls in silence, waiting for the warden or me to make our daily calls. Conversation can be quite hard, he often gives one word answers, not because he is being rude but because he can't think of any way to elaborate. As a consequence, I know that a lot of carers go in, do their tasks and leave.





Just recently I asked him why he does not go out more, and was surprised to hear that he was in fact sitting in waiting for the warden and me to arrive.

'It's rude to go out when you know someone is coming to visit'

So in fact along with his meals on wheels, our visits had become his life. He was even sitting in waiting for the 'check' call over the tannoy system

This was obviously unacceptable, so I suggested to Dennis that he at least go to  'The Coffee Morning'* on Wednesdays and I will make my visit later on that day.

The following Wednesday I arrived just after he had got home and the difference in him was remarkable; He was smiling, talkative and more alive than I have ever known since visiting him.

It's an interesting thought that Carers are supposed to improve quality of life, but in this case we had become a hindrance.

Since that day I have spoken to the family and suggested  '**Singing for the brain', which he now attends on Thursdays.


* Quote from a lady 'why do they call them coffee mornings, when we all drink tea?'
** http://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=760

good hygiene

George is an elderly man who although he can walk it can sometimes prove to be a bit of an effort.

I walked in to find him sitting at the dining table eating his lunch and as I went to give him his tablets, I noticed he had sterile gloves on his  hands






'Why are you wearing those gloves?' I enquired

'Well nobody gave me any gloves when I had my catheter fitted, so I bought my own for when I empty the urine from the bag down the toilet.'

I cringed slightly as I asked why he was eating his lunch with them on?'

'Well I forgot to put them on before I emptied my catheter bag and when I sat down to eat I realised I had not washed my hands afterwards; As the gloves were on the table, I put them on on to save me having to get up again.'

Of course silly me. Quite logical really

The marriage proposal

I overheard a conversation between two female carers today that made me smile,

'I have had to pull out of one of my calls this week because one of my gentlemen asked me to marry him,'

'Oh my God! What did you say?'

'Well I laughed because I thought he was joking, and then he got really upset.so I explained that I already had a boyfriend so I could not except.'

giggles

'It's not funny  I felt really sorry for the guy'

'Sorry, I was just thinking you get proposed to and the nearest thing I get to a compliment is an old boy telling me that I shouldn't wear this blouse because it makes me look fat.'

'Oh Dear! What did you say?'

'Well I am normally quite calm but as he is always so rude and it was the wrong time of the month to tell a lady she was fat, I politely pointed out that a man with no teeth in his mouth isn't exactly an oil painting himself'

the love triangle

There maybe romance blossoming at one of the care homes. The trouble is that we have a love triangle developing......

Or maybe not......

Pat was sitting in the garden talking to me, when a lady who I had never met before came over and whispered to Pat that she should keep her hands off of her Jack.
Now Jack is a quiet, amiable, unassuming sort of chap, who you will often find in the communal garden chatting to Pat . There is nothing in it, they just enjoy each other's company; Nothing more, nothing less.


So back to the story;

'Keep your hands off of my Jack, I was here first' admonishes the mystery lady.
What! says Pat. 'I don't want him. What do I want with a man in my life at my age? Nothing but trouble I've had enough of that malarkey. You can bloody well have him!

Good for her you might say, but did she really have to say all that when Jack was standing sheepishly next to her.

They haven't got dementia have they?

John suffers with dementia but you would not know it. I have been visiting him for nearly a year now and he always knows who I am; what he is doing and where he is going. I have often wondered why I make the visits as he has always got up and got dressed, has taken his medication and remembers to put his pendant alarm on.
Yes he is a bit shy and it has taken me a long time to build a trust with him but he seems ok

Pam suffers with dementia but you would not know it. I have been seeing her for about six months; she also knows who I am, when I will arrive, and even drives a car to her grandson on most days to do her washing. Sure she loses her keys on a daily basis but then so do I. She occasionally repeats herself but then who doesn't. The only sign that I can see is her obsession with cleaning; she never stops, but there are lots of people like that too.


So have they really got dementia?
The trouble is that dementia comes in so many different forms

John is having his apartment refurbished and the change in routine really agitating him and making him anxious. When I arrive he is pacing back and forward and won't sit down, He keeps going over and over  the same things and worrying about when it will all be finished.  I sit with him for about half an hour longer than I should but eventually have to leave him on his own. I speak to the warden and she promised to pop back in later. Yes, he has dementia!

 

Pam's medication runs out for her dementia  and because it is the weekend the chemist has not got any in stock until Monday. I arrive on Sunday to find Pam tearful and paranoid that someone is trying to get into her house. The cat has gone missing and in her imagination the woman next door has killed it  (just because she said she does not like cats) and because of a passing comment from someone about cleanliness she is scrubbing the kitchen floor more rigorously than normal. I stay a bit longer and to try and calm her down but until Monday the problem can't be solved. Yes, she has dementia! ............



.........but whatever you do don't mention it in front of her or you'll feel the sharp end of her tongue.

Whenever she asks me what her tablets are for I always tactfully say they are for blood pressure or bones; unfortunately a new carer went in and when asked, told her that the little white one was to keep her anxiety down because she has dementia.  This was an unwise move because not only did she tell the carer in no uncertain terms that she did not have dementia but then proceeded to tell me about it every day for the next fortnight.

'I mean I don't have dementia do I, Bloody cheek'

Alexander the beetle

Last year I learnt the poem below to perform at Old Time Music Hall.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Forgiven by A.A. Milne

I found a little beetle; so that Beetle was his name,
And I called him Alexander and he answered just the same.
I put him in a match-box, and I kept him all the day ...
Then Nanny let my beetle out -
Yes, Nanny let my beetle out -
She went and let my beetle out -
And Beetle ran away.

She said she didn't mean it, and I never said she did,
She said she wanted matches and she just took off the lid,
She said that she was sorry, but it's difficult to catch
An excited sort of beetle you've mistaken for a match.

She said that she was sorry, and I really mustn't mind,
As there's lots and lots of beetles which she's certain we could find,
If we looked about the garden for the holes where beetles hid -
And we'd get another match-box and write BEETLE on the lid.

We went to all the places which a beetle might be near,
And we made the sort of noises which a beetle likes to hear,
And I saw a kind of something, and I gave a sort of shout:
"A beetle-house and Alexander Beetle coming out!"

It was Alexander Beetle I'm as certain as can be,
And he had a sort of look as if he thought it must be Me,
And he had a sort of look as if he thought he ought to say:
"I'm very very sorry that I tried to run away."

And Nanny's very sorry too for you-know-what-she-did,
And she's writing ALEXANDER very blackly on the lid,
So Nan and Me are friends, because it's difficult to catch
An excited Alexander you've mistaken for a match.

 

I always finish the last line by clapping my hands together and accidently squashing the beetle, I then run off shouting 'Nanny'


As I became more confident with my lines I started to perform for my ladies and gents with varying responses, from bemusement as they wonder about my sanity, to absolute glee.  Even now I still occasionally perform it to new people if I feel it will brighten up their day; I affectionately call it  'Getting Alexander beetle out of his box.'
Recently I performed for one of my new ladies and the giggles I heard as I walked out of the door, were priceless.

This same lady has temporarily lost the use of her legs and lives in a flat with no lift.
'I'm doing a couple more steps a day' she told me' My aim is get down those stairs to see the outside world again'
Following my performance of Alexander, the lady was asking about my shows.
'I do Music Hall every year at the theatre just up the road'
'Oh It's a shame I can't get there, I'd enjoy that' she said
'Well I'll tell you what' I replied 'You get down those stairs by Christmas and I will come and pick you up and take you to the matinee.
Oh that is really lovely, thank you so much. Do you mean it?'
'Of course'
Then she burst into tears
'Thank you so much I now have a real purpose to get down those stairs'

If anyone else fancies coming along to my shows with the Lytton players visit
http://www.lyttonplayers.co.uk/

 

 

Be careful what you wish for.......

We all want to live to a ripe old age, but as I have been assisting people with their care over the past year, a thought often strikes me that life goes round in a full circle and there comes a point when living to a ripe old age isn’t always the best thing.

When we are born we are pushed around in a pram until we learn to walk with the aid of a frame; as we get older we inevitably need walking aids, be it a stick or a frame and in some cases end up in a wheelchair to help us get around.



As a child we are spoon fed until we eventually learn to feed ourselves using the spoon; Many of my ladies and gents have reverted back to a spoon and indeed some use their fingers to eat because it is so much easier;  as with children I often cut the crusts off of the bread because the elderly do not have teeth to chew. and some of my ladies and gents have to rely on people like me to spoon feed them because they are no longer able to do so themselves

When we are born, we wear nappies and have somebody wipe our bottoms. The elderly often wear a pad and need help cleaning themselves up. In many cases a catheter bag is used to take away the worry of getting to the toilet on time.

We spend a lot of our early lives in bed asleep.. I have quite a few people who spend their life in bed because they are so tired or have lost track of day and night   Many can’t get out of bed even if they want to.

Finally, in our early years we can’t speak and have to learn to recognise friends and family; sadly some of my ladies and gents don’t even recognise their own spouse.

I have a few service users who often comment ‘I hope I don’t wake up tomorrow morning. I have lived far too long.’

I never quite know what to say…

Whatever I say seems inapt and inept


Be careful what wish for…. And take care of your health before it is too late